Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize