i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
accomplished twins. life is a go
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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