we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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