if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize