whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Randomize
