SEEEEXXX PLEASE
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
