I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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