What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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