i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
