so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize