He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
