drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Is Oprah even human
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
