My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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