i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Randomize
