Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
