There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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