I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Randomize
