Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
