More tranny stories later!
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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