Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
just tell him i said nine months
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize