yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
