from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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