You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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