Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize