apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
