i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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