Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
