so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
