I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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