i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize