when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Vodka?
Forever.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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