i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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