The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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