I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
