Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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