turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
