this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
