wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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