Moan for me like Helen Keller
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
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