He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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