there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
