Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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