i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize