we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
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