I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I just found puke in my bra..
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
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