She said her name was "party"
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
