I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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