Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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