I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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