vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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